Molly Grattan Presents: Bring Me the Head of Scott Baio!

“Meet me at the Clock of the Nations, in Midtown Plaza, Rochester, New York- where each passing hour is gaily saluted in the carnival spirit that is universal with people everywhere, and I’ll acquaint you with ROCHESTER: A CITY OF QUALITY.”

--Rochester: A City of Quality (1963)

I’ve been writing a lot of marketing copy lately, and I think it’s finally getting to me. Or maybe it's the ephemeral and educational films I've been downloading off the internet. So, we have the top music school in the country, the world’s premiere film archive and the country’s largest Children’s Museum. We may have unleashed Mitch Miller on an unsuspecting public, but we did give the world Susan B. Anthony and Cab Calloway. We also have Louise Brooks’s corpse.

“There has never been any nonsense about the purpose of the city… quite simply, it is considered a place to make a profit, as pleasantly as possible. The community is fully aware of the financial facts of life, and the methods of making an area economically prosperous.”

--Rochester: A City of Quality (1963)

And, according to the press conference I attended last week, in 2006 we’ll break ground on Renaissance Square, a $200+ million performing arts center/bus station/college campus complex. I guess it’s supposed to lead to a wave of gentrification throughout the city, raising property values and enticing people to move here.

One of the blocks slated for demolition is Midtown Plaza, the Mall of The Future, circa 1960. Presumably, the Cold War-friendly Clock of the Nations will go, too.

It makes me a little sad. When Times Square was “revived” in the mid-90’s it lost all of its skankiness, to become unbearably sterile and corporate. I suppose overpriced chain restaurants and mega-stores are better than crack dealers and porno theaters. But at least the porn was colorful.

“Rochester- quality people, quality industries, skilled industries and skilled people, clean industries, clean people, stable industries, stable people.”

-Rochester: A City of Quality (1963)

So, in anticipation of Rochester’s downtown renaissance, I present a fond tribute to my 10 favorite scummy attractions that are certain to disappear in the name of aggressive family-friendliness:

“Meet me at the Clock of the Nations, in Midtown Plaza, Rochester, New York- where each passing hour is gaily saluted in the carnival spirit that is universal with people everywhere, and I’ll acquaint you with ROCHESTER: A CITY OF QUALITY.” *--Rochester: A City of Quality (1963)* I’ve been writing a lot of marketing copy lately, and I think it’s finally getting to me. Or maybe it's the ephemeral and educational films I've been downloading off the internet. So, we have the top music school in the country, the world’s premiere film archive and the country’s largest Children’s Museum. We may have unleashed Mitch Miller on an unsuspecting public, but we did give the world Susan B. Anthony and Cab Calloway. We also have Louise Brooks’s corpse. “There has never been any nonsense about the purpose of the city… quite simply, it is considered a place to make a profit, as pleasantly as possible. The community is fully aware of the financial facts of life, and the methods of making an area economically prosperous.” *--Rochester: A City of Quality (1963)* And, according to the press conference I attended last week, in 2006 we’ll break ground on Renaissance Square, a $200+ million performing arts center/bus station/college campus complex. I guess it’s supposed to lead to a wave of gentrification throughout the city, raising property values and enticing people to move here. One of the blocks slated for demolition is Midtown Plaza, the Mall of The Future, circa 1960. Presumably, the Cold War-friendly Clock of the Nations will go, too. It makes me a little sad. When Times Square was “revived” in the mid-90’s it lost all of its skankiness, to become unbearably sterile and corporate. I suppose overpriced chain restaurants and mega-stores are better than crack dealers and porno theaters. But at least the porn was colorful. “Rochester- quality people, quality industries, skilled industries and skilled people, clean industries, clean people, stable industries, stable people.” *-Rochester: A City of Quality (1963)* So, in anticipation of Rochester’s downtown renaissance, I present a fond tribute to my 10 favorite scummy attractions that are certain to disappear in the name of aggressive family-friendliness:
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